Thursday, January 28, 2010

Black People. I love you Kelsey B. And your ukelele asian kids

I really wish I could dance. This is a random topic that popped into my head today. But my dancing ability comes up almost daily. And I know exactly why...
See I'm black. And by being a black kid surrounded by a bunch of white people you have certain responsibilities. I am the token black kid. And even though being the token black kid looks easy, its actually a very hard task. The expectations are almost impossible because 1. Being the only black kid I have no ghetto black people to learn from and 2. white kids have never been around real black people and they have absolutely no idea how they act. Some of the expectations are:
  • That I should eat fried chicken and drink Kool-Aid- White people believe that for breakfast, lunch, dinner, brunch, and lupper black people are munching on fried chicken and washing it down with red drink (if you are not familiar w/ black lingo this is cherry Kool-Aid). This is not true. I don't even like fried chicken or care for Kool-Aid.
  • That I should talk in ebonics and wear Apple Bottoms- When people first see meet me they automatically think I'm not very black. Their thoughts are usually confirmed when I open my mouth and don't sound like I failed the 5th grade. See there is a reason why I go to school for all these freaking years. I will flaunt the things I have learned over and over in english class and not say things like "Gurrrl I is gettin' my hurr did today!" because I know that saying the word "girl" is not supposed make you sound like a tiger. And also I don't enjoy having apples/handprints/words on my butt. Its just awkward.
  • That I should have amazing dance abilities- This one annoys me the most. Just because I'm black doesn't mean I can Drop It Low, Move Shake and Drop, Pop That Body (like a loli?), and make all the boys say Yeah! The only thing I can do is the shopping cart, which is like the whitest dance ever. It even beats out the sprinkler and robot. I've been foolish enough to try and learn to breakdance thinking it would make me cool. I just ended up with a swollen neck and pinky toe that makes me scream bloody murder whenever lightly taped against anything (I really should have a doctor check that...). My efforts were not total failures though because I did learn how to sort of execute a babyfreeze... which looks about as retarded as it sounds.
There are lots more stereotypes that I could talk write whole freaking thesis papers on. Fortunately, I will spare you cuz I'm pretty sure you don't care that much. But I have come to realize that if there were no false expectations and if I wasn't black and didn't try so hard to be the token black kid, I would probably have no friends. Because part of what makes me, well me, is being the special token oreo. And for right now I am just fine with that.
~Nia
(allison b is the best person i know. dont shoot yourself in the mouth even if you are more likely to die that way! :)

6 comments:

Unknown said...

oh i guess it look like im the first one to comment on this ahhahah saw ur post on facebook so i decided to go to your blog and dont worry nia its ok to be a an oreo haha your blacker than cameron is at least

allison. said...

I CANT BELIEVE I READ THIS WHOLE EFFFFFIINNG THING, saying to myself ooh she'll mention me like she said, oh its probably at the bottom, guess what i found when i got to the bottom. random shit! yeah thats right i said it. THANKS FOR KEEPING PROMISES NIA. IF YOU DONT SEE ME AT SCHOOL TOMORROW TELL THE POLICE I SHOT MYSELF IN THE MOUTH NOT THE TEMPLE BECAUSE YOUR MORE LIKELY TO DIE THAT WAY. yeah bitch.



and seth, you would comment.

sarah said...

nia, i would love you even if you weren't the token black kid! but you stereotype yourself. jerk.

no seriously. you can jerk.

Rebecca said...

ok first off. congrats on having 19 followers! i knew you could get over two! :) and second off great post i know its coming from the heart.... hhaha... so thats why its funny. more of those pleasee

Alyson B. said...

hahahahahahahahah oh nia. this made me smile/laugh so much.i love how u didnt mention me btw >:( but anyways this is probably one f the funniest things i have ever read in my life. and u r so right about how ur ebonics and dancing suck. lol .keep being that oreo nia :) Love, Alyson <3

Joseph Oliver said...

it becomes even more awkward when people stare/read said things printed on yer butt